Embracing Uncertainty in Decision-Making

Why It's Okay to Not Have All the Answers

Do you ever find yourself in a situation where you feel like you should know what you want? For example, a friend asks you for a favor, a coworker asks you for help, or your boss makes a request, and you end up feeling confused about whether you want to say yes or if you want to say no. I used to find myself in these situations all the time, confused about whether I should say yes or whether I should say no and internally beating myself up because I should know better. I should know what I’m OK with and what I’m not OK with. I should know what I want and what I don’t want. But life doesn’t work that way.

In today’s article, I want to discuss the pressure we put on ourselves as recovering people-pleasers to know exactly what we want and what we don’t want. We believe there must be a right answer to everything and beat ourselves up when we end up feeling confused and doubtful of ourselves and our choices.

This picture was from a road trip I took with my partner and Teddy, and it reminds me of how fun it can be to be spontaneous and just live in the moment.

Many people-pleasers have been taught that it’s not OK to change their minds. If you’ve committed to something, you must follow through, no matter what. Quitting is for losers, and giving up is for the weak. Today, I want to discuss the consequences of this mindset because life does not operate in absolutes.