Reconnecting with Yourself: Advice for Recovering People-Pleasers

Small Daily Actions to Overcome Disconnection and Embrace Your Authentic Self

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As recovering people-pleasers, we often find ourselves disconnected from our true selves. We have spent so much time and energy trying to please others that we forget to tend to our own needs and desires. This disconnection can lead to feelings of emptiness, confusion, and even anxiety, often ending in feeling lost and directionless.

However, it is possible to reconnect with ourselves and rediscover who we truly are. In this article, we will explore why we disconnect from ourselves, and you will get actionable advice on how to reconnect with yourself through small daily actions.

Why we disconnect from ourselves?

People-pleasers often disconnect from themselves as a coping mechanism to deal with the stress and pressure of constantly trying to please others. Disconnecting from yourself means suppressing and ignoring your own needs, feelings, wants, and instincts. Resulting in feelings disconnected from yourself, unsure of who you are, what you need, and what's important to you.

For example, let's say you have a friend who constantly asks you to hang out and do things for them. You find yourself saying "yes" even when you don't really want to, because you don't want to disappoint them or risk damaging the friendship. You keep suppressing your own needs and wants, ignoring the fact that you might need some time alone or to do something else entirely.

Over time, you start to feel disconnected from yourself, unsure of what you really want or need. You might start to feel resentful towards your friend, or towards yourself for constantly putting their needs before your own. You might find it difficult to make decisions or feel guilty when you do things for yourself, even if they are things you enjoy.

In this example, you have disconnected from yourself as a coping mechanism to deal with the stress and pressure of pleasing others. You have suppressed your own needs and wants to prioritize the needs of your friend, which has resulted in you feeling unsure of yourself and your own desires.

Do you feel disconnected from yourself? Let me know in the comments below.

How to reconnect with ourselves through small daily actions?

1. Practice self-awareness: Start paying attention to your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Set aside time each day to reflect on your thoughts and feelings. You can do this through journaling, meditating, or simply taking a few minutes to be still and quiet. Ask yourself what you need in the moment, and try to respond to those needs in a way that is true to yourself.

2. Set boundaries: Setting boundaries is an important aspect of reconnecting with yourself. This means learning to say no when you need to, and being clear about your own needs and expectations in your relationships. It can be difficult at first, but it will ultimately help you to prioritize your own well-being. Identify areas of your life where you need to set boundaries. For example, if you find yourself saying yes to things you don't want to do, practice saying no. Be clear about your own needs and expectations in your relationships. Communicate your boundaries in a respectful and assertive way.

3. Engage in self-care: Taking care of yourself is essential to reconnecting with yourself. This can include things like taking a relaxing bath, going for a walk in nature, practicing yoga, or simply indulging in a hobby you enjoy. The key is to find activities that nourish your body and soul and make time for them regularly. Make self-care a priority in your daily routine. Schedule time to find what works for you and commit to doing it regularly.

4. Embrace your values: Identifying and embracing your personal values can help you to stay connected to yourself. What matters most to you? What do you stand for? Make decisions that reflect your values and beliefs. By living in alignment with your values, you can feel more authentic and fulfilled.

5. Practice self-compassion: Finally, it's important to be gentle with yourself as you navigate the process of reconnecting with yourself. Remember that it's okay to make mistakes, and that self-compassion is key to healing and growth. Practice positive self-talk and remind yourself that you are worthy and deserving of love and respect.

Takeaways

In conclusion, as recovering people-pleasers, we can learn to reconnect with ourselves and rediscover who we truly are. By practicing self-awareness, setting boundaries, engaging in self-care, embracing our values, and practicing self-compassion, we can take small daily actions that lead to a more authentic and fulfilling life. Remember that reconnecting with yourself is a journey, and that it's never too late to start.

What will you add to your daily routine to reconnect with yourself? Let me know in the comments below.